11th March 2016
Dear Diary,
Joined the Force. Not the Star Wars one. The REAL one.
Look at me now: on the highest of SWAT teams, buying weapons with my own money.
My government hates me.
12th March 2016
Dear Diary,
Frank is a moron. He flashed me twice with a flashbang.
I think he’s doing it on purpose. He must be rich.
Richer than me. I cannot afford two flashbangs.
Stupid Frank.
13th March 2016
Dear Diary,
Frank asked me to buy him an AWP. What the hell? Does it say “Hugo Boss” on my helmet?
I gave him a Bizon. Good luck getting headshots with that, Frank!
…
Frank shot me in the leg.
14th March 2016
Dear Diary,
I quit. Joined the other team. They promise a bigger salary.
They dress funny, but I don’t care. I get to keep my helmet.
One of them shouted something at me, I couldn’t make it out but I bought him a Bizon.
…
Got shot in the other leg. I hate people.
15th March 2016
Dear Diary,
My new friends gave me a phone! I’m so happy!
It was a bit bulky and had some wires sticking out of it, but it’s the thought that counts.
It had a customer service number attached to it, but when I called, all I got was a series of beeps and clicks.
Needless to say, a few moments later, I got through… the wall, the door, a few flower pots and I’m pretty sure my body went through a van that was parked nearby. And I killed a chicken.
I miss Frank.